i’m pretty tolerant and pretty non-obtrusive when it comes to my preference to eat vegetarian foods. i’ve done more than my fair share of getting prodded and probed about if i’ve ever eaten a steak (i have, long ago), or if i miss meat (i don’t, i don’t see why i would if i’m choosing to eat vegetarian). but when people treat it like it’s a disease because they like meat and can’t understand how people eat without meat, that’s when i want to claw people’s faces with my bare hands.
i’m not a second class citizen. i eat like everybody else. there’s a whole world of delicacies that aren’t meat out there. just because it’s not meat doesn’t mean it might as well be dirt.
*kickpunchscream*
flat gougères are so sad. i got the fluffy inside about right, but the outcome of trying out alain ducasse’s recipe turned out bunk.
also one of my parchment sheets almost caught on fire. i need a new brand of parchment paper.
tips for next time: don’t try to substitute whole wheat pastry flour, of if you substitute whole wheat pastry flour, try an extra tablespoon or two to compensate for the lack of density. also, make sure the batter is thick and that you probably cook out the water in the dough. oh, and aerate, aerate, aerate!
so it’s finally november and around the time where you do autumnal things like apple picking, buying sweaters, and generally eating more. it’s the only time of year when eating half a casserole dish of fancy-pants macaroni & cheese is forgivable, and almost welcome.
in the light of recent events, i’ve been doing the best to keep myself busy. i bought a sewing machine to try to learn and do new things. i embarked on a string of sewing classes and learned that the sewing machine i bought is the most ill-recommended sewing machine for anyone who wants to sew. crafty-types, avoid singers! anything but singers! i am about to start rolling into my baking phase, where i learn to bake a new thing every weekend. and just as i’m about to do this, i’m slated to be entirely too busy doing work-related tasks. isn’t that how it always is? you never have time to do the things you want to do because in order to do the things you want to do, you need to be able to afford the things you want to do. so it changes things, i suppose.
but for now, my latest task is to attempt to learn how to make somewhat healthy and/or lowfat gougères. considering how heavily this recipe relies on fats and general yum, we’ll see how that works out.
times like these, it’s really heartwarming to hear from people you don’t expect. old friends you haven’t connected with as much recently. and on the flip side, how weird it feels to be completely ignored by people you thought would say something, anything. it’s made me appreciate everyone who has dropped a line to me all the more. i’m so much more thankful than you could imagine. so many heightened emotions and feelings, and it flat out sucks. not feeling hungry but pretty much binging to make myself feel better.
there just needs to be a pause button to the day.
it has been the worst 72 hours of my life.
and now my heart is absolutely broken. i hope you’re rubbing your face into giant couches and sneezing everywhere/on everyone as much as you want, where ever you are. i’m so sorry, boy. i miss you so much.

:(
hrm. spending $30k on anything other putting in money toward a house makes me want to cry. stupid standards.
i mentioned to my boss earlier that i started going to a trainer because i was taking an early stand against turning 30. and that’s when i realized how close i am to turning 30.
and commence freakout.
my headache today is worse than usual. perhaps i have parasites in my brain laying cysts around my ventricles.
today is just one of those days where i just don’t know where i get the patience to do simple things like drink water or tie my shoelaces.
it’s weird being totally shafted and having to still try to act like everything’s normal. it sucks. it’s lame, and if only i had a sugar daddy to make this all better.
ugh. i envy barry’s life right now. and i really miss my life around november/december of 2005. four years ago doesn’t seem like so long ago, but it might as well be decades ago.